Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Faith

There have been more than a few recent events that have made me question my faith in others. I feel that I may hold too much faith in certain people. Until recently, I didn't understand that it was possible to pour too much faith into a significant person. Now, it's a hard reality that's beginning to set in.

Maybe my intentions were misunderstood. Perhaps my friendship was mistaken for something more than that. I have never befriended another human being simply out of concern for his or her well-being or out of pity. I am outgoing, but I chose my friends wisely. I befriend people whose company I can enjoy. They're people whom I can relate to. I am able and willing to confide in them. Sometimes it only takes a short time to grow a strong connection with an individual. Sometimes it only takes a short time to develop a great deal of care for another human being. Sometimes the greatest relationships peak at good friendships.

It is exhausting to care for someone who is disrespectful. It doesn't matter if someone is disrespectful to a you or a friend, or even a stranger. It's painful to witness and nearly impossible to ignore. I do not allow people to take advantage of me. I try to steer clear of conditional friendships. I do things for my friends and family that I'm not forced to do. I lend a hand when help is needed. Although I hope that the favor will someday be returned, it's not a requirement. Even so, I don't hesitate to say no.

The hardest realization that I have come to accept is that nine times out of ten, a disrespectful person is a good individual who is hiding behind a façade. The only way to truly help someone like this is by not helping at all; instead, it's better to stand in the background for support. I haven't yet decided what to do, but at this point, it seems a lot easier to deal with the pain of losing someone significant than it seems to deal with the pain of disrespect. On the other hand, nothing worthwhile is easy. I believe you and I believe in you. I will continue to hold my faith for now, but at this rate, not forever. I care tremendously. You're no greater than or less than a good friend, and I hope that you'll begin to realize that.