Friday, February 6, 2009

On Love

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

On a cold Upstate New York day in late January, 1971, Carolyn Campbell was preparing to say goodbye to her fiancé, who was being put on assignment to cover the Charles Manson verdict. He would be staying in Los Angeles, California for a week to piece together a story for the Associated Press, but would stay in Southern California for an extra three weeks to visit family and friends.

Carolyn was not able to take time off from work to travel with her fiancé. This didn't bother her much because her relationship with him had been slowly deteriorating over the past two months. The night before her fiancé left, they had gotten into a fight over their futures together. Presently, they were not on good speaking terms.

Carolyn saw her fiancé off at the airport and left almost immediately to go home. There was no "I love yous" and "good lucks" this time. It was a beautiful morning as Carolyn drove away from the airport terminal. The sun was very bright, which gave a false impression that it was warm. In fact, much of the United States was in the midst of one of the coldest winters in ninety years. The temperature hovered just above 0F that day. Nothing in Carolyns life had seemed to warm her recently. It was as if she had been staring into an empty void for two months. She was unsure what she wanted to do, and she was about ready to call of her engagement.

As the days went by, Carolyn began to feel a pang inside of her. She didn't recognize it at first, but she began to realize that she missed her fiancé. Each passing day brought with it a stronger sense of regret. Carolyn had been able to think everything out logically in the first week of her fiancés absence. She realized that she had been unfair and stubborn about some things, and she hoped that her fiancé felt the same way regarding other things. By the second week, she looked forward to seeing him again.

She had not been able to contact her fiancé during the first week because he was busy working hard on his story. The second week was not any easier, because he was moving around a lot, visiting family and friends. There wasn't any time to relax and talk. Carolyn had been feeling better about her relationship with her fiancé, and she looked forward to talking with him again. They had told each other that they would talk again within three weeks. She was beginning to regret not saying "I love you" before he left for L.A. She had never stopped loving him, but she had been blinded by relationship drama, and she couldn't see through the haze. In the time of his absence, Carolyn realized how much she loved him, and she hoped that he would ask her to marry him soon. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with him.

Around 1:00pm on a mid-February day, Carolyn received a telephone call. She could sense that it was her fiancé calling her. She hurried to the phone and answered with a joyful "Hello, sweetheart!" Then, her life crumbled before her.

Carolyn's fiancé had been critically injured in a serious automobile accident on a Los Angeles freeway. There was a one hundred car pile-up early in the morning due to fog and reduced visibility. Her fiancé was in a coma. Doctors were unsure if he'd be able to pull out.

Within one day, Carolyn was at her fiancés side. She sat next to him with tears in her eyes, waiting for him to suddenly wake up and give her a kiss. She held his right hand, believing that she would never let go. Nurses kept shuffling in and out of the hospital room. As the hours ticked away, Carolyn's energy slowly drained away. She fell asleep next to her fiancé and woke up to see nurses and doctors surrounding the hospital bed. She knew that there wasn't any hope. He was too far gone, and she didn't want to make him suffer life in a vegetative state. She kissed him firmly on his forehead and whispered "I love you, and I always have. I am sorry for the past two months. Please forgive me." A moment later, the heart rate monitor went flat, and her fiancé died.

*****

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

In the absence of loved ones, it is easy to realize how significant they are. Seven thousand miles is a long distance from home. It has made me realize that home is a wonderful place. I miss Upstate New York like I never have. I miss my family more than I think I've ever experienced. I miss you, my friends, so much, because you are the greatest friends I have made in my 2o years of life. In my first two weeks in Japan, I have begun to understand the culture, the language, and how much everyone and everything at home is worth to me.

The list goes on...

Imagine, just imagine, what I'll add in three more months.

I love you all and miss you greatly, more than I've even experienced.

And I love you, too, and I am always with you. Rest easy, because you never have to worry about that.

[Meet Challenges:
It is in meeting
the small challenges of daily living
that we prepare ourselves
for the greatest challenges of life.]

-No Limits But the Sky

And so the journey continues on...