Solitary

In the course of a significant journey, it can be expected that there will be many legs that are traveled in solitude. For if this was not the case, then there would be no time to reflect upon the foundation of the journey: growth, experience, learning, acceptance, tolerance, and so on. What if, however, each leg traveled becomes more solitary, and each significant person seems to become more distant? How should one account for all of the conflicting emotions that arise?

I have decided that growth cannot be experienced without conflict, and at times, great conflict signifies a growth spurt. My conflict arises right now from the thought of my future, which is more or less terrifying to me. The thing that scares me most is returning home to significant change, which I am not sure I will be able to handle after experiencing a sensory overload, so to speak, while living in another country--another world.

In the past three months, I have watched from a great distance so many people undergo significant change. I am pleased to see this taking place, as change is one of the greatest essences of life. I have undergone a great deal of change as well, particularly within my own personal realm. It comes at the thought of all of this change that I wish I could have remained with all of you to experience it. It is a frightening prospect to think that I do not know what I will return to in five weeks. I am struggling with this right now, because for the first time I get to view it from this side of the glass. I find this to be a solitary conflict right now.

I am not sad, as I understand that I am in the middle of growth. I feel that in five weeks time, my view on this subject will have changed considerably. I need you all to remain with me right now, through the rest of this journey, and beyond. Please don't doubt my strength and love.

Now the home-stretch begins. In five weeks, this experience will wash up on shore and dry up, but the memories will never fade, and the lessons learned will never disappear. Knowing full-well to make each passing day count, let's continue to aim onward and upward. Life is a two-way street, so let's continue to keep it flowing both ways.

As the journey draws closer to the end, so a new journey begins.